Big Brain Academy: The Winner Takes It All

Jack Simpson

Head of Marketing and Communications

Clapton is god

“It all” being the bragging rights and sheer glory of knowing there is no one in the Web Apps team greater than you at clicking at a flat-screen television – who needs monetary gain when there is All The Glory on offer? Having (nearly) completed the semi-finals of the tournament, the final looms ahead of us: who will be named the Champion of the Brain?

Ragin’ Robin Lester bulldozed his way into the final yesterday after a devastatingly close encounter with competitive contender John Palowski. Kris ‘Carnage Creator’ Cartwright joins Ragin’ Robin in the final, after he snatched victory from the grasp of Wah Yan Lau, who was soaring ahead in the lead until one particularly nasty game of numbers, which sent the Carnage Creator firing into the lead.

Vivienne “The Machine” Dean will take on Safder “Smasher” Iqbal prior to the final to determine who will qualify in their semi-final match for a chance to compete in the Final Shakedown (my money is on the Machine, but I’m told Smasher is a dark horse and secretly hankering for All The Glory). After our three finalists are selected in tomorrow’s Ultimate Shakedown, each will play the other two in a three-game battle – whoever wins two games will be named our champion. In the unlikely event of a tie, in which all three finalists win one game each, we will turn to the game percentages (which will have been duly noted by myself – and I am not often open to bribes) to establish who shall be entitled to All The Glory.

For those of you wanting to witness this monumental sporting event first-hand, the Big Brain Academy Extravaganza comes to a head tomorrow (Thursday 28th July) at 12.30 in the board room. Be there, or be… rather bored in your lunch-hour.